Y'know what my girlfriends call me fucktard? Divorcebait. Can you guess why? Can you guess just by looking at my hot as fuck body? Can you guess why I'm Divorcebait by the way I dress - by the way I can hold perfect eye-contact with you while I twizzle my hair and bite my lip? Can you guess why I'm called Divorcebait by my cute girly giggle, how I flirt, or how I know exactly how to tease a boner out of every guy that looks my way? It's all those things for sure - but there's more. I'm Divorcebait because I hunt down submissive married men - beta males just like you! I know that all the tactics that earned me my nickname are totally irresistible to wimps like you - wimps who fall over themselves to impress girls like me. Wimps desperate for a hot girl's attention - wimps eager to drop to their knees just for the chance of licking the gum from the bottom of my pretty shoes. You're a sucker for a girl like me aren't you - a total Divorcebait victim waiting to happen. And you're not gonna have to wait long either loser.
You wanna meet me at the mall simp-piggie? You can take me shopping - we'll head to all the cute boutiques and girly stores that make older guys like you feel so fucking uncomfortable and I'll pick out hot little outfits for your approval. I know you like it when hot girls do that kinda thing - ask you for your opinion on a super-short skirt like it even matters. Ask you which heel matches the outfit the best like you'd even know. You'll look so obvious as my sugar-daddy, following me around as I snap my gum and point out even more expensive things to buy with your money. And that's the point - what Divorcebait wants - Divorcebait gets and you're gonna pay for it. You'll pay for the bags and the shoes and the clothes and everything else I make you carry to the check-out or I'll fucking embarrass you. If you complain I'm spending to much or ask me if I really need that extra pair of Gucci sunglasses to match the bag - I'll makes sure everyone knows the situation - that you're not actually my boyfriend - that I don't even like you - I'm just using you - that you're a pay-piggie taking his Princess shopping!
I know you won't want me to expose you as a pay-piggie in front of the cute check-out girl. I know you won't want all the mall-brats giggling at you and all my girlfriends sneering with contempt at you - and I know you want to impress your Princess because it's the only way you think you'd ever have a chance with me. You think buying me cute things is gonna earn you a real date with Divorcebait - dinner, a bar and then back to my apartment to fulfil your extra-marital fantasies. So you'll hand over that card and charge whatever it costs and you'll do your fucking best not to look totally fucking ruined in the process. And if you can manage all that - I'll give you a 'Good Boy' Loud enough for all the girls to hear. I might even peck you on the cheek and leave a nice big glossy lipstick mark on your flustered little face but that's all you'll be getting from me. You're gonna have to take me shopping a lot more than this to earn a date with Divorcebait.
